happy birthday, Valerie.

Happy birthday Valerie. I'm just gonna start this by letting you know that your existence is a bliss to the world and me and it’d be the best if you keep it that way. I can only wish you for your own version of happiness, i know mine and yours can hold different types of scoop, so whatever happiness means to you, i hope it latches onto you eternally like an adoring little fan. I hope you know you deserve every last bit of good things exist in this world without anyone having to spit it out right in front of your face, because you truly do. But if you ever need words of affirmation, here’s a little something for you. Im writing these because you mean the world to me and i want to be able to remind you of that as much as i can, and as much as you need it. Open the letters whenever the topics apply to your current state, knowing you so well, i bet you wouldn’t follow the ground rule and would open everything as soon as i send this to you. Try your best not to peak though, curiosity killed the cat! Enjoy your birthday to the fullest, Val. Godspeed.

A series of our journey to keep the memories alive. This contains a big chunk of cringe-worthy contents so buckle up your seatbelt and enjoy the ride.

Our very first encounter. Honorary mention to nigritude for providing the bigger odds for us.

How i slid into your dm:

Valerie's very first compliment to Jeff:

Valerie showing her jealousy for the very first time:

My very first post showing us off:

Our very first movie date. Movie title: Love, Simon

Valerie is the cutest when shes jealous.

First conversation in kkt. I hadn't told her who i was back then so when "jeff" came outta nowhere i almost pissed my pants out of fright. Turned out Valerie was talking to her other friend whose name is also Jeff.

Me being the biggest prankster i am, here's the first prank i pulled on Valerie:

Got my first morning greeting (privately) from Valerie.

SHE SAID SHE'LL MISS MY COMPANY

Couldn't find the part in which i confessed my feelings toward her and asked her to be mine, no big deal, it went shortly and simply. She answered with "y x g kuy" and that was pretty much it. We started dating originally on June 9 2018 but we both weren't satisfied enough with the date so we canceled it out and came to an agreement to do it all again the next day. That was how the 10th of every month became our day.

Our first argument. Since the fight was too embarrassing to even recall, I'm just gonna show how Valerie showered me with cute texts to shoo away my anger.

Our latest movie and porn dates

That's it as if for now. We had too much fun and I'm too sleepy as I'm writing this to dig up for another memorable moments. I'll let the rest of the hidden references to only live within me.

Just know that every time you feel the need to open this tab right here, my heart aches a bit at the fact that you need constant reassurance of how i feel about you. Of course i love you, silly. You were the one person who would tell me the things that I didn’t want to hear but needed to. You tried to change and shape me into a better person, you might or might not have accomplished this one, but i appreciated every effort you made that stretched out far and beyond. You're an absolute 10/10 and you made it easy to fall for you and for that, you will always have a special spot in my heart, even after what happened to us, even after we ended things out, you’re always there. It might not be worth that much, but you have every inch of my heart. I know you cant help but to gather up all the doubts because of how persistent i was to call us quit. I know our ending wasn't your finest day but our relationship didn’t end because of a lack of love. Things just weren’t as simple as they used to be when we first got together, so much shits and obstacles were thrown against us and I took the easy road. But again, I love you. That’s never going to change.

You have a habit of pushing yourself too hard, that is honestly my least favorite thing about you. Don’t be too hard on yourself, take things slowly, and get yourself a breakthrough that you deserve. Watch some movies, munch some snacks, crash on bed, and anything else that helps to relieve the stress. I notice sickness tends to strike you up around this period of time therefore i want you to take a good care of yourself and your health. Take your vitamin, grab a gallon of water and drink it up in one shot, treat yourself high nutrition foods and give yourself a decent amount of rest. I hate to repeat myself to you for the nth time but stop scrolling around social media aimlessly ‘cause it sure as hell wont help you get the grades you need.

You know god damn well I’ve never been a good at making people laugh so i’ll leave this out fully to the internet trolls.

Collection of contents that never fails to me laugh out loud:

• 1. This beyond funny please spare some minutes of your day to watch this

• 2. The awkward kind of funny, my favorite.

• 3. https://youtu.be/nxBbHkSlXHk

• 4. https://youtu.be/OAvGWKdIumY

• 5. https://youtu.be/_wFbiy_LIH8

Another overthinking? Anxiety attacks? Insecurity? I know its impossible to shut down your mind, but i know whatever thoughts linger around it isn't legit. It's all in your head. Now take a deep breath, drag your lazy ass off of your bed, step outside, get some air, and treat yourself a cotton candy flavored ice cream. Nothing some scoops of ice cream can't fix, right? If its still doesn't solve shit out, i'm only one "hi" away. Pouring the sadness really help easing it up, so hit anyone up, doesn't have to be me, you have a whole bunch of people who care about you, don't ghost them. Focus on the things and people that matter in your life, the rest will work itself out. Cheer up, buttercup. Storms don't last a life time.

Not to sound cocky but i feel like this one’s gonna be the section you’re gonna visit most. At least I hope it is. When you finally pay a visit here, please know that the feeling is all mutual. I’m probably there, at the other side of the continent, missing you too. Probably also restraining myself for saying it because i have always been afraid that I will only be such an annoyance to you. You asked me a rather silly question last night, about whether i would ever miss your presence if you disappeared and I can’t help but to shake my head in disbelief. Valerie, you have me wrapped around your fingers. I miss you every second of the day the silence lingers around us. But do not miss out on life because of it, rather than putting the longing at the top of priority, i hope you’ll put it aside until we both are free from our own bubble of bustle. As much as i love and i miss you, your triumphs mean so much more than anything, even my silly little yearnings.

Getting into your nerves is indeed something I’m best at but please know that i never want to intentionally make you mad at me. Sorry for making you mad, whatever that is, i would never want any other version of Valerie than the happy-go-lucky-girl one. Please forgive me and be done with it as soon as it can possibly be. Nag at me as much as you want, it’s gonna help lessen your anger towards me.

You probably have another nightmare in which you have a chasing games with a huge ass snake or other weird creatures your brain creatively formed. Baby its not real and they can never hurt you. Just try not to think about it and go back to sleep, definitely dont try to pick up every last bit memory of it and inform it to me or anyone else that matters, it helps you recalling it even more so please don’t do it. If you have another sleep deprivation... I’m not a doctor so I’m not gonna tell you what you clearly know about more than i do. But fuck it im just gonna say it, its dangerous and unhealthy! Your body can tolerate it when its once or a twice thing but stop torturing it. Here are the following impacts to scare the shit out of you even more: (source: google)

1. Not getting enough sleep prevents the body from strengthening the immune system and producing more cytokines to fight infection. This can mean a person can take longer to recover from illness as well as having an increased risk of chronic illness.

2. Sleep deprivation can also result in an increased risk of new and advanced respiratory diseases.

3. A lack of sleep can affect body weight. Two hormones in the body, leptin and ghrelin, control feelings of hunger and satiety, or fullness. The levels of these hormones are affected by sleep. Sleep deprivation also causes the release of insulin, which leads to increased fat storage and a higher risk of type 2 diabetes.

4. Sleep helps the heart vessels to heal and rebuild as well as affecting processes that maintain blood pressure and sugar levels as well as inflammation control. Not sleeping enough increases the risk of cardiovascular disease.

5. Insufficient sleep can affect hormone production, including growth hormones and testosterone in men.


Cut off the caffeine consumption, little by little, will you?